FTM Homebirth Story: The Birth of Harlow
Written by Rebecca Benetti, First Time Mumma birthing at home.
Photo by Zoe Wheatley
Monday 19th September I was experiencing some pre-labour cramps. Very mild period-like cramps that were not patterned or had any sort of rhythm. That night after a shower I had some mucus plug wiped away. I put a pad on and kept an eye on it and messaged my midwife and doula just in case. I went to sleep as normal, the cramps were pretty much the same.
I woke around 3 am on 20th September to the cramping and got up to go to the toilet. I tried to go back to sleep but it started to become uncomfortable for me to lie down so I got up and walked around my living area, then vomited in the sink. I thought maybe a shower might help so I hopped in the shower at around 4 am. At this point, I had messaged my birth team (doula, midwife, photographer) that I was in labour and to stand by. I remember the contractions getting more intense in the shower and I also vomited again.
I got out of the shower at around 5/5:15 am and messaged my mum and a few friends to let them know. I tried the tens machine but didn’t like it at all, I kept it on for a bit longer to see if it helped as I progressed. I laboured leaning over my couch on my knees for a while and called my photographer. She heard me breathe through a contraction deciding to leave straight away (good choice). I messaged my doula to come at around 5:30 as I felt things were progressing. My doula arrived at 6 where she gave me 2 birth combs to use. I used the birth combs leaning over my couch on my knees again. I felt best on my hands and knees as I breathed through each wave. I tried a few different poses with my doula but quickly moved back to the couch (during this I asked her to remove the tens machine I did not enjoy it at all and found it annoying/ distracting).
Photo by Zoe Wheatley
Chris and my doula took turns in supporting me by squeezing my hips and massaging my back which was so helpful and relieving as well as the birth combs. My doula was timing contractions for my midwife and called her around 6:40 (as I believe I was 1 minute with 2/3 minutes apart). Not long after that, I told to my doula that I wanted to get into the pool, she encouraged me to wait a little bit to not get into the pool too early. My midwife must have arrived just after 7 and continued through my waves.
Photo by Zoe Wheatley
I got into the pool at around 8 (these are rough times as I had no sense of time) the pool was an instant relief! My water broke in the pool not long after I got in. I remember feeling a pop or crack-like sensation through a surge. My body began to push soon after (not realising I was pushing). Chris called my photographer to see how far she was because my birth team thought I might be close to birth already. She was 15 minutes away. At this point, my doula took a few snaps of me in the pool. I pushed for about an hour. My midwife had advised me that his head was just off-centre slightly so we got out of the pool and tried an inversion. I was ass up on my couch with my elbows and forearms on the floor for about 10 minutes, still pushing through the waves. I got down on the floor into a squat my team then told me to reach down and feel his head. I could feel the top of his head and hair, it was so surreal!
Photo by Zoe Wheatley
I came back into the pool and pushed for a bit longer. My team told me to bare down into it. I used my voice as much as I could during my labour, screaming the house down! Harlows head was halfway out as I hit transition, I could feel the burn (ring of fire) and said “I can’t do it!”. My doula and Chris encouraged me and told me his head was halfway out to reach down and feel I was almost there, I WAS doing it. That motivated me to give another push and his head came out. I had a second to rest and breathe before another surge came and I pushed the rest of his body out as my midwife received him.
My sweet boy Harlow was born at 10:42 am the 20th of September. He was so calm as he landed on my chest, barely noticing he was even born. After a few pats on the back, he let out a few noises. I was in absolute disbelief and euphoria with what I’d just achieved. We sat in the pool for a while as a little family just taking it all in.
Photo by Zoe Wheatley
He latched to my breast straight away taking all the good colostrum. I got out of the pool maybe around 11, making my way to my bathroom to birth my placenta. I sat on the toilet with a bowl underneath, holding Harlow trying to feed him (he was still attached as we did delay cord clamping for as long as possible). It had been over an hour and still nothing. I gave a few tugs and a few pushes but by this point, I was exhausted with no energy and to be honest, pushing was not something I wanted to do again after birth. I asked my midwife what we could do, and she gave me an oxytocin shot, pushed on my belly and pulled my placenta out as I pushed (Chris cut the cord before hand and took Harlow to put on his first outfit).
My midwife inspected me and told me I had torn in 2 places. I had a 2cm perineal tear and a small tear on my labia with some small grazes on the other side. She was able to give me a local anaesthetic and stitch me up in the comfort of my bedroom.
I showered, got into bed and enjoyed my family bubble. My midwife did all his checks. He weighed 4.02kgs and was 52cms in length. My team left at around 2:30.
A note from Nikola;
You too can have an empowering experience for your first birth! Get in touch with me if you have any questions about homebirth or how we can work together. Let’s chat!
If you would like to share your homebirth story please get in contact with me nikola@illuminatewithnikola.com
Together we can change our birthing culture and make transformational birth normal again.
